Thursday, April 15, 2010

Found

Good news, my runners have been located in country Victoria and are hopefully on their way here now, clearly I havent looked for them since Christmas.

I have been researching some toning/sculpting shoes while looking around online and may treat myself to a pair when I hit my 5% goal of weight loss. The shoes are a bit expensive, but if they help work out while I am already walking, then thats all good. Its good to have a present to look forward to.

The last few days I have been feeling like a zombie, going through the motions of each day on auto pilot. I have a headache behind my eyes and I cant seem to pull myself out of it. I have a lot of trouble sleeping and tend to live off about 5 hours a night, clearly not the best way to function. My brain is working overtime at the moment and I have lots of emotions bubbling to the surface. Lying in bed of a night and having all of this running around in my head does not help falling asleep. I think some valerian is in order tonight.

One of the things that I have been focusing on at the moment is looking at what I want my life to look like when I lose weight, it cant be the same as it is now. The life that I am trying to shed is set up for a fat person, it really is. I am trying to transition that mentally to start living the life of a non fat person. That means some changes though. Am I ready for those changes? Is my family? Well we will see, I am focused on motivating myself at the moment, as that is all I can control... me. I do know that I want to be surrounded by positive people, who are genuine and enjoy life. Anything less than that and I know I will be pulled down into a negative spiral which for me ends in food.

Bring on the peace, love and low fat... baby.

1 comment:

  1. Ya know, I left you a comment on this post a few days ago but I didn't realize I'd have to click "post" twice so I left the page before it went through. Now that I come back to it I'm just now seeing this and also I'm just now seeing the sentence at the bottom of your post, "Bring on peace, love, and low fat...baby." The post I quoted you in, I called "Peace, Love, and Chocolate". I promise I didn't name my post after your last sentence...it's total coincidence. lol I actually had a big portion of my blog post written before I came back over to see what you wrote. After reading your post, what you said was actually on my mind for a few days...it made me think. :) So, I knew I wanted to share what you wrote w/ other bloggers. I hope this was ok. :)

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